Sunday, May 29, 2005
Saturday, May 21, 2005
It's past eight o' clock in the evening and it's only dropped down to 92 degrees outside. I think the high for today was 103 degrees. I can't believe how hot it gets here; then again, it is the desert. What else can you expect? Last night my mom and I were walking out of Wal-Mart around this time and you could literally feel the heat still rising out of the asphalt. Even at night you can fry an egg on the street!
Anyway, I haven't felt really inspired to do much of anything, let alone write a blog entry. My day-to-day life is pretty much one boring cycle. I wake up, go to work, come home, and spend my evenings alone in my room. I need a hobby, or at least a social life. I came to the realization a long time ago that I absolutely do not know how to make friends. Some people know how to make friends naturally, others find it more natural to spend time alone. I obviously fit into the later, though there are times where I just really need to have some human contact. I know I often say that I could live by myself on a desert island. Thinking about it, I would eventually go nuts living inside my own head all the time. I like to have my thoughts heard. I like being opinionated and letting people know it. The problem is, sometimes it sounds right in my head, but then it comes out completely different. People often misunderstand and take it the wrong way. Then again, there probably isn't anything wrong with me. I probably have a lot to learn from life.Speaking of life, at the moment, it is pretty much left on hold. I feel like a string marionet waiting for the curtains to open. I have some plans with my sister that I hope will happen; there's just a lot of waiting involved, and I absolutely hate waiting - waiting, and uncertainty. I feel more secure and at peace when I know that something is going to happen the way I planned. Otherwise, I have to have a back up plan and all this other crap in case my original plans don't go through. I just want things settled already. If it's not going to happen I want to know now so I still have time to do something else.
Anyway, I haven't felt really inspired to do much of anything, let alone write a blog entry. My day-to-day life is pretty much one boring cycle. I wake up, go to work, come home, and spend my evenings alone in my room. I need a hobby, or at least a social life. I came to the realization a long time ago that I absolutely do not know how to make friends. Some people know how to make friends naturally, others find it more natural to spend time alone. I obviously fit into the later, though there are times where I just really need to have some human contact. I know I often say that I could live by myself on a desert island. Thinking about it, I would eventually go nuts living inside my own head all the time. I like to have my thoughts heard. I like being opinionated and letting people know it. The problem is, sometimes it sounds right in my head, but then it comes out completely different. People often misunderstand and take it the wrong way. Then again, there probably isn't anything wrong with me. I probably have a lot to learn from life.Speaking of life, at the moment, it is pretty much left on hold. I feel like a string marionet waiting for the curtains to open. I have some plans with my sister that I hope will happen; there's just a lot of waiting involved, and I absolutely hate waiting - waiting, and uncertainty. I feel more secure and at peace when I know that something is going to happen the way I planned. Otherwise, I have to have a back up plan and all this other crap in case my original plans don't go through. I just want things settled already. If it's not going to happen I want to know now so I still have time to do something else.
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